School Refusal… What is it? Impacts and Solutions

As we return to the new school term and our children skip off to school once again, I reflect upon the many children who struggle to make it back to school so quickly. Three years ago, that was me and my son. Unfortunately, school will be a scary place for so many of our neurodiverse little ones this year, and this is an increasing reality.

Having a neurodiverse child is delightful, painful, life-changing, rewarding, but most of all – a struggle. It doesn’t mean we don’t love them just as much as one loves their non-neurodiverse son or daughter. It just means we grow a thick skin FAST and have to love our children even more. WHY? Because the system does not allow for anyone outside the box. Children with neurodiverse needs are outside the box in the most glorious way! However, parents are forced to push and push, scream and jump up and down against a rigid system to get the needs met of their lovely, perfectly designed, neurodiverse children.

As a mum of twin boys with ASD and ADHD, feeling disrespected by services meant to support us, like school, among others. We were instead left in isolation.

Three years ago, my son fell into a depression as school became an unfathomable monster he had to face every day. Screaming, overwhelm, self-hatred, tears, running and refusing to get in or out of the car. My words had little impact; his emotions and powerful distress won the day.

Having two other children to get to school and watching him suffer pained me too. So, I gave in.

He would happily watch his computer all day. We tried doing some maths activities and visiting the library or museum, but realistically, I’m not a teacher.

School refusal is a real thing and needs more attention. In the last twenty to thirty years. And much for the better. It should be recognised that the old-school system is outdated. In the industrial era, we used to prepare our children to work in factories.

School attendance rates have dropped significantly. Staying with an outdated schooling system is definitely not the way forward. It’s time to adapt.

School refusal is hard to track; however, the rate of school attendance has dropped, with the identifiable catalyst being the COVID lockdown in 2019. Since then, many children have struggled to return to school.

Indigenous children and children with Autism and ADHD are most severely impacted.

Dr Shannon Clark, Parliament of Australia Research Paper, Estimates

“The prevalence of school refusal in Australian and international literature is between 1% to 5% of all students. Its prevalence is higher among students with autism spectrum disorders and attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder.”

School refusal is often complex. Many things can trigger it.

In my son’s case, it was the morning bus driver. But in many families, it is an ongoing challenge, and school has been just too daunting for years and years.

Dr Matt Bach, the Victorian shadow minister for education, quotes in the Age Jan 30^th 2023.

“School refusal stems from anxiety, which – as we know – is a serious mental health condition. And because of this, parents naturally empathise deeply with their children. Yet what the growing number of children who refuse to attend school need most is tough love. Going to school must simply be non-negotiable.”

– don’t be this guy.

Such a ‘pull your socks up’ attitude is not only doomed, but it is also harmful to the mental health of many vulnerable children struggling to get to school across Australia.

The United Nations Convention on Rights of the Child agrees that every child has an equal right to education. That a child shall have the right to the development of their personality, talents and mental and physical abilities to their fullest potential.

Thus, the government, that is the Department of Education, has a responsibility to provide education to ALL children.

How can schools adjust the learning environment to accommodate all students?

1. Regular “brain” and “action” breaks

Not all children can sit and focus from lunch to recess. Some simple intermittent physical or mental exercise has a positive effect by increasing engagement and mental abilities, making learning easier and more pleasurable for the rest of the day. K to year 3, like simple jumping, skipping or ball games. Year 4 to Year 6 dancing

2. Reduce school bells

School bells have their roots in the school-to-factory pipeline. Although it helps move kids from place to place, it is unnecessary. In fact, it can be a sensory disruption to some children. In fact, Concord High rolled out no bells in 2023 with good results. Ms Dell says,

“Concord saw no-bell policies as one way of getting students ready for real-world jobs and college.” She also said it took some adjusting on behalf of parents and students and “ I think as it’s gone on, it hasn’t really been an issue. There are the same little pockets of kids being late to class, but that’s always a thing.”

3. Educate teachers – to be responsive and supportive

With so many more diagnoses, we need to be providing training to teachers (not just teacher’s aides) about neurodiversity and special needs. With such training on board, teachers can respond effectively to a child’s challenging behaviour, overwhelming feelings or genuine struggles at school. Being supportive means not being seen as overbearing. Teachers must use empathy and friendship skills to help children see themselves and the school as a place of safety. Help your child build strong, trusting relations with adults at school.

4. Communicate positively with parents

Always keep conversations positive and friendly. Try to speak up as early as you notice possible warning signs. Respond to the parents promptly with understanding and compassion. Don’t threaten the parent or the child. Also, please don’t blame the parent for not pushing their child hard enough. You may not know what they are experiencing outside school.

5. Encourage quiet or sensory spaces

Some children find a playground to be a big, crowded mess rather than a place of sociability and play. The senses may be overwhelmed. The toilets smell….bad. Fluorescent lights blink and make noise. Make adjustments within the classroom.

What is the impact of not changing the school environment?

A lot is being done in the education department to create positive reform. Educators are listening. However, it is taking time, and without a child at school, a parent can feel in a sort of ‘limbo-land’—left without many options.

When parents are left without options, they may resort to:-

• Homeschooling, which can mean one income or reliance on government benefits

• Alternative schools or private schools which are costly and put financial stress on families.

This can lead to:-

• It can lead to missed opportunities for students

• Increasing mental health issues due to social isolation

• Incidental academic decline

While not doing anything to address school refusal is Dr Bach’s approach. We all know and care for our little ones too much not to adjust the school landscape to fit our changing society and environment. It is the goal that all children make it back to school, yet not every child will fit the mould. Let us work for the child and the family and bring education to them in the best way that suits.